After giving birth to my baby girl, I experienced an overwhelming sense of emptiness. I grappled with confusion and shame because I expected to feel a profound love and connection with my newborn daughter, but those feelings were absent. I felt like a robotic mother, going through the motions without emotion. The stress of wondering what was wrong with me took a toll on my health and relationships. I began isolating myself from family and friends, using food to numb my deep sadness and anger, and withdrawing from life's engagements due to exhaustion. I didn't realize I had Postpartum Depression (PPD), which had progressed to Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) without treatment. I believed something was inherently wrong with me, and I contemplated leaving my family.

I vividly recall the awkwardness of waiting for my first therapy session. I feared that the therapist would confirm my brokenness and hopelessness. Despite my urge to flee the waiting room, I stayed. Instead of validating my fears, the therapist reassured me that many women struggle with PPD, many individuals live with MDD, and many can lead fulfilling lives. I learned to pay attention to my body and mind, acquiring tools to manage my behaviors, thoughts, and emotions. Hope started to blossom within me, the hope of feeling like "myself" again. I began seeking solace in long hugs from my husband and confiding in him about my struggles. I started searching for moments of joy with my baby girl and reached out for help when I couldn't be there for her in a healthy way. My healing journey began.